March 2012
reblog this post
don’t ask just go
TEAM ROCKET IS BLASTING OFF AGAAAAAAAIN
- *Hears noises at night*: Well this is it this is the end for me I had a good life
- *Gets shampoo in my eyes*: I guess I'm blind now how am I going to go on holy fink
- *Heart is beating fast*: I think I am having a heart attack is this what cardiac arrest is
- *A cop walks by*: Here I go about to get arrested I probably murdered someone I'm sure they know about when I smoked that one time
- *Taking a test*: Don't take your eyes off of this paper you will get caught cheating and get kicked out of school
- *Gets a sunburn*: Skin cancer
LIFE!
DEATH!
LIFE!
DEATH!
LIFE!
あああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああ
No matter who you are, what you have been through, how terrible you have felt, regardless of where you come from, what you do, what you look like, how you behave, always know that one thing above everything else is true.
Jack Harkness would fuck you.
Sex for Procreation
- Morality Teacher: The church recognizes that sexuality is something you are born with, but the reason that gay sex is immoral is because sex is supposed to always to be open for procreation.
- Me: But what about if a woman is born infertile, is it just crap luck and she can't ever have sex either?
- Morality Teacher: That's a little different, as long as she's open with becoming pregnant then it would be open to procreation and therefore moral.
- Me: What if a gay guy was totally okay and open to getting pregnant? It's just as likely and the exact same thing.
- Morality Teacher: ....I don't know man
Good Evening, sir/madam
I am a nigerian prince from the local branch of your bank and we have received word that your account details have been hacked, please respond as soon as possible so that we can transfer you 5 million dollars worth of viagra to meet hot local girls in your area
[click here to Like on Facebook]
getting a job is so fucking hard.
PEOPLE DON’T HIRE YOU IF YOU HAVE NO EXPERIENCE.
well, you fucktards, how the fuck can I get experience IF YOU WON’T HIRE ME.
reblog for truth
but also because i always read hades in james woods’ voice
i think the worst part about cringing when irl people use dated internet humor in conversation is that you are always the only one who is never laughing and you get made out to be a humorless dick when really the thing they said hasn't been funny for over half a decade
the “epic win” scenario
History Fun Fact
In Liechtenstein’s last military engagement, in 1886, none of its 80 soldiers were killed. In fact 81 returned, including a new Italian “friend.”
Yep, more came home than left. I don’t think that has been done any other time in history.
This is one of my favourite points in history
It’s so funny omfg
if u ever find yourself having a bad day and you’re not feeling good about yourself
remember there are real people in this word who willingly wrote winnie the pooh yaoi